Monday, April 23, 2012

Somebody That I Used to Know

I recently had an interesting experience. I ran into someone that I used to love. I mean I LOVED HIM. We had this connection that I've had with very few people, we were together all the time, and people saw it. We were perfect together. Anyway he started dating someone else and we stopped talking. I lost my best friend. I have seen him a couple of times since then. Once I saw him, but he didn't see me, the other time we ran into each other and said hi and were friendly. Occasionally we'll text a "Happy Birthday" or a "Merry Christmas" but nothing much more beyond that. Anyway it has been about 8 months since we stopped seeing each other. I saw him recently he was without the girl so he sat with me and we talked for a while. He looked different. Rather, I saw him differently. He was no longer the person I loved, he was a person I used to know. We would joke like we used to, we would laugh like we used to, we had all these inside jokes that we would throw out, but it was different. It wasn't like it was before. It was fake, because that was the only way we knew how to be together, but it wasn't real anymore. It was strange to look at him, I felt like I was meeting him for the first time again. A big part of what I loved about him was how we were together. Being "us" together. We weren't "us" anymore so I looked at him not as somebody I loved anymore. It was bittersweet. I still miss my best friend. I miss being "us" but it also felt really good to know that after such a deep heartbreak you can be ok again. I was glad to know that I wouldn't always long for him. That I could be around him and not hurt. It felt good to know that I had moved passed it. I did love him, I will always be a little bit sad about the loss of the friendship. It's so strange to me that someone can go from someone you LOVE so much to simply someone that you used to know.

1 comment:

  1. Julia, this is a SONG waiting to happen! I guess the title already is a song...but you could write a better one!

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